Create-a-Caption: Spike's got a special pitch for LeBron

"I don't get the title, Spike."

"It's like Miami, but with crime."

"So, 'Criami?'"

"Yep. Sort of like I did with 'Crooklyn.' Meaning exactly what I did with that."

"And I'm the star?"

"Yep. You play Li'l Onions."

"That sounds like a really good name, but maybe it could be Cri'l Crunions?"

"I like the way you think, LeBron."

Don't worry if you're not hip to all the lingo — that's some real high-powered Hollywood insider-type movie talk right there. Best caption wins a Cradonna-crore complex. Good luck.

In our last adventure: Eric Maynor really needs to tell James Harden something.

Winner, EJ: James Harden: "I have THREE times as much hair on my face as he does on his head."

Eric Maynor: "Haha, yeah, he needs that Rogaine ASAP."

Brian Cardinal: "That may be true, but I make this look good."

Runner-up, mr. jones: Eric Maynor needs to work on his ventriloquist act. Brian Cardinal needs to work on his catwalk.

(NOTE: The model's walk itself isn't the catwalk. As any Right Said Fred die-hard remembers, we do our little turns ON the catwalk, which is the platform on which models walk. C'mon, son. Step ya remembering-"I'm-Too-Sexy"-lyrics up.)

Second runner-up, Mr: Harden: "I get it, REALLY! [Cardinal is] doing the 'I'm a little teapot' song. I get it. It's just not that funny, OKAY?"

George Mikan Earl Monroe Shaquille O Neal Hakeem Olajuwon Robert Parish