LeBron James gets texting all wrong

If you ever want to be reminded of why people have a nigh-on impossible time rooting for LeBron James, just wait a day. Something, even if it might be apocryphal, might come out.

Like this nugget, from Mike Wise. Mike doesn't make stuff up, but while the player he's quoted might be passing along fables, it runs so close to the nasty ideal that James has lived up to over these last few years, that it makes sense:

For example, a player recently told me LeBron had contacted him about possibly joining forces in the offseason, though he was cryptic about where he actually might play. The text began: "Yo, this is King James."

"I was like, 'Give me a break. You're going to call yourself that?' "the player said, on condition that his name not be used.

"Do you think Michael Jordan texts people by starting with, 'Yo, this is His Airness.' Come on, get over yourself."

First of all, Michael Jordan doesn't text. He calls. It's kind of what makes him so scary. In a world full of people with social anxiety disorder hiding from their ringing phones, MJ is on the line, waiting for you to pick up.

Secondly, yeah. This is sort of what happens when you're a national superstar two years before you're even done with high school.

James is such an unholy mix at this point, that his martyrdom has almost become expected. It's a nasty amalgam of having to work under the biggest spotlight sports has ever produced, while being told you're doing everything right by those immediately surrounding you, while hearing that you're doing everything wrong by those who are just a step outside that circle. Nothing, no matter the talent and regardless of accomplishments (James' Heat, lest you forget, are two wins away from a championship with two potential home games left to go in their season) that may come as part of the package.

It's why people name their kids "Blanket." It's why Gwyneth Paltrow thinks she can help you raise your children. It's why Paris Hilton thinks we care.

On the bright side, King James, at least you can still entertain. Start cutting harder, finishing quicker in the shot clock, and drop 30 in Game 6 on Sunday.

Before we hear another embarrassing anecdote, even if it isn't to be believed, on Monday.

Bob Cousy Dave Cowens Billy Cunningham Dave DeBusschere Clyde Drexler