C-a-C: Impending lockout got you glum? Get your Chris Paul on

Listen: No one's arguing that this doesn't suck. Even if it's 70 and sunny where you are, it's a dark day -- a day we knew was coming, but dark all the same. But you can't just sit there and dwell on it; all that's going to do is buy you a one-way ticket to Frowntown. Nah, dog. You've got to step your emotional agency game up.

Commander the Good Ship You. Run really fast for a little while, taking solace in the fact that your body is an evolutionary marvel capable of high-level biomechanical function. Roll your sleeves up, chief; let that sun get all up on your shoulders. Put on big sunglasses without worrying that you might look weird in them. Sneak a sly thumb's up to the world around you. Wrest control of what's going on in your heart away from the owners and the players (but really, probably mostly�the owners).

Smile. Get your Chris Paul on. It's all we can do now, y'know?

Best caption wins Chris Paul's Game 1 from Round 1 against the Lakers. If this doesn't make you smile, you must be rocking forum blue and gold. Good luck.

In our last adventure: INTO THE PAST! Compassionate Rasheed Wallace radiates light and warmth in the general direction of Sad Bonzi Wells. Let the sunshine in, Mr. Wells.

Winner, Waynehead: "We got this," Sheed proclaims to Wells as the Blazers are up 13 to start the fourth. (ED. NOTE: Sorry, Blazers fans.)

Runner-up, Joao Clemente: Oh, 2001. A time when you could pick any two random Blazers and have four healthy knees.

Second runner-up, Johnnybalb: Wells: "Man ... just look at him over there, Sheed. How'd you know Z-Bo was gonna eat ANOTHER burrito during this timeout?"

Wallace: "It's not called a guaransheed for nothing. Now pay up, son."

A Special Commendation in Ruling, Commentus Interruptus Division, goes to Andrew C: "l like basketball bec"

Bill Sharman John Stockton Isiah Thomas Nate Thurmond Wes Unseld